Wednesday, February 4, 2009

I'm turning 41 in 5 months...

Well, not really... but at the rate we're going, with the days whizzing on by and the months rolling on in the blink of an eye, and the year over as quick as it begun... shit, i might as well be.

I swear i was only 23 a few weeks ago. I still sorta believe i'm 23 years old. haha! I have to remind myself that that was 2 and a half years ago. Some memories are still fresh in my mind. I swear, i feel like i remember last year's New Year party better than i do the one that JUST passed. Strange.

2008 flew by faster than any year i know. I don't understand it. It seems like 2009 is either moving at the same rate... or flying by even faster. January is over???

I'm not writing this complaining about my age. No way. It's not that. I just feel like the days are passing me by and i don't even realize it. I find it hard to grasp. Life really does happen in the blink of an eye. Have i just been too busy to notice? Have i not been living enough? Or have i been living too much?

I can't believe Dylan is turning 5. That's all your fingers in one hand. When did he start growing up? He used to fit in my palm and not walk or talk yet. These days, he's got suggestions on what he wants for breakfast and picks out which pair of shoes he wants to wear with his outfit. He knows where to go at the mall and he doesn't need help eating. He's capable of doing all that on his own. My baby's not a baby anymore. I guess he really hasn't been a baby for a long time now.

My baby brother is 5 inches taller than me. When the hell did that happen? I'm a decade older than him.

Ian and i have spent almost a year and half apart. Before the long distance started, i was worrying about whether or not i'd make it through 6 months... a year would have been miraculous. We planned to be together by 2 years. Now, we're shooting for 5 more years. That's some serious shit. Cake though, right? I mean, it looks like time is on our side. I can get a lot done in 5 years... and so can he.

I used to complain to my mom and ask her why my baby book was never completed. There are dates that aren't filled out. I don't know when exactly i executed all my "firsts", or when my teeth started sprouting and how tall i got at a certain age. She just used to tell me that there was no time for it, or she forgot. Before i had Dylan, i thought it was a load of crap- all you do is watch children, cook, and clean. How hard could that have been??
Oh wow. How SO WRONG was i??? i deserve to be sneered at for that comment. My mom has the right to laugh at me til i no longer exist. Karma is great.
Here i am, years later, with a child of my own. I barely clean (my dad should be laughing his heart out at this moment), i only cook every now and then- nothing close to 3 meals a day, and it doesn't really take that much to look after Dylan. He's pretty good at taking care of himself. Yet, the baby book is incomplete, i've neglected to measure his height every month, and pictures? Hmm... they're somewhere. Haha!
HOnestly, i find it a great & pleasant surprise to find baby pictures wedged into old diaries, planners, and random boxes with other pictures of my "old life", with other stacks of pictures of friends who have come and gone. Nonetheless, i should get to organizing them. No excuse.

Ah, the gift of life.
I remember a time when i used to think that 25 was considered LIGHT YEARS away for me. Those people were old (haha). The farthest i've ever gone to envisioning my future ended at 24. Past that, i had no idea what i was gonna do or what life had in store for me. I'm more of a live-life-a-day-at-a-time chick. I'm turning 26 this year. I can't believe it.
Seriously, where did the years go???

I have a lot in store for me this year. Big changes, HUUUUUUUUUGE. It's scary and exciting at the same time. I really need to brace myself.
I keep putting off things i should be doing to make room for things i HAVE to get done. I just hope i'm making wise decisions.
Time lost is something you can't ever get back.

“How did it get so late so soon?
Its night before its afternoon.
December is here before its June.
My goodness how the time has flewn.
How did it get so late so soon?”
-Dr. Seuss


1 comment:

//DJ Dmadness// said...

what up thea. big shout from the bay! brraap brrap!!